A Letter To My Phone’s GPS


Dear Motorola Droid II Verizon Navigator,

We have had some good times you and I. The day I powered the phone up for the first time and clicked on your application. You captured me with you beautiful smile, your easy to read screen, and of course your automated voice directions. And oh the trips we took, up to Cleveland, over to Indianapolis, and who could forget our getaway to Hilton Head late last summer.

But, sadly dear navigator, something has changed. You have let yourself go. You are not as fast as you were before, you give me the wrong directions, and when you are searching for a GPS Satellite” I think you are downright ignoring me. Take yesterday for instance, you said you knew where you were going and you were right, until the last five crucial minutes of the trip when you decided to take a nap. How rude and embarrassing could you be, in front of my coworkers no less? You know what Verizon Navigator, let me break it down for you so you will be able to keep up and not have to buffer, either you clean up your act or we’re through!

No more freezing, no more bad directions, and most of all stop jerking me around with the long way to my destinations, it’s not scenic its annoying…oh and by the way by the sound of your voice, you could afford to shed a couple pounds. Clean it up or I’m replacing you with the handy GPS that comes with the new Escape I have my eye on. I mean come on who could blame me, the Ford GPS is quick, accurate, and it sounds more like a human anyway.


Alex (Your irate owner)